This article was taken from the Fall/Winter 2006 edition of Healing Magazine.
It was written by: Ellen Notbohm and Patti Rawling-Anderson
Although "fortune-teller" is not one of the services provided in a typical IEP (Individualized Education Plan), you can know with certainty that medical science and education will only continue to grow during all the years of your child's development. Whatever the special needs may be, in no previous generation has there been a better time for optimism.
Preparing a child for adulthood begins long, long before job skills training or learning to balance a checkbook or navigate a grocery store. The good/bad news is there is no recipe, no how-to mannual that will have all the answers for your unique child. But the seeds of preparation lie in just that - the special abilities, strengths, interests and motivations that every child has, regardless of ability. The most important brick in your child's road to adulthood is recognizing those special components and using them to develop your parent-child relationship in a way that gives him both roots and wings. Roots - knowing that she belongs, is connected to others, is valued and capable and needed. Wings - knowing that she has the inner resources to learn and do and, with practice, succeed.
Clearly, finding the fine line, the "just right" amount of challenge for your child, can be tricky. If you set the expectation too high, the child feels defeated before even starting. Why try? he thinks. If we set the expectation too low, we promote laziness and dependency.
The most important thing a parent can do is help his child laugh, play and build relationships with all of the people in their lives. That's more important than therapy, more important than speech and language and more important than cognition. When a child feels connected, he has the internal motivation he needs to do all those other things.
Never forget that a parent's attitude toward the child is going to be that childs's attitude toward himself. If helping create a sound-emotional sense of self is not the primary focus of what you are providing to your child, no amount of "therapy" or "education" you layer on top is going to matter. See her and celebrate her as the capable, interesting, productive and valuable adult you have every reason to believe she can be. And hold that vision, because, through your eyes, she sees it too. Seeing is believing, and believing makes it happen.
Upper Room Christian School has the largest special education department of any Christian School on Long Island. Ten percent of our total population have IEP's and are serviced on location through the Half Hollow Hills School District. We are committed to providing a loving Christian environment whenever possible for any student regardless of their special needs.
For more information by the writers of this article go to:
Grace and Peace,
Ed
